Hot Wheel’d

“I’m sorry,” she said with an exasperated look.  “They can’t keep their hands off each other.” “They’re not bothering me—I know what its like,” I said. She smiled as if to say thank you. Her pair of boys had stopped swinging each other around like airplanes and moved on to tugging at her. Not getting the attention he wanted the youngest looked at me—his Chestnut eyes and mop of curly hair winning me over right away. He presented the Hot Wheels car in his palm and motioning toward his mother […]

“I’m sorry,” she said with an exasperated look.  “They can’t keep their hands off each other.” “They’re not bothering me—I know what its like,” I said. She smiled as if to say thank you. Her pair of boys had stopped swinging each other around like airplanes and moved on to tugging at her. Not getting the attention he wanted the youngest looked at me—his Chestnut eyes and mop of curly hair winning me over right away. He presented the Hot Wheels car in his palm and motioning toward his mother [...]Keep reading...

A Gift For A King

“Mom, what’s something you’d like for Christmas,” he asked. Luke had the day off from work and I got the impression he was headed out shopping. “I don’t know,” I said.  I’ve had a hard time coming up with a list this year.  I have everything I need.” “Well, is there something you’d just like?” “I like so many things even that’s hard,” I said. I could see that I needed to come up with something.  Luke, while not a penny finder like his brother, is still very thoughtful. I […]

“Mom, what’s something you’d like for Christmas,” he asked. Luke had the day off from work and I got the impression he was headed out shopping. “I don’t know,” I said.  I’ve had a hard time coming up with a list this year.  I have everything I need.” “Well, is there something you’d just like?” “I like so many things even that’s hard,” I said. I could see that I needed to come up with something.  Luke, while not a penny finder like his brother, is still very thoughtful. I [...]Keep reading...

Looks Like

After breakfast when Buddy started circling my feet I knew he was hoping a walk was in the plan.  It’s hard to say no to his bearded face but I wanted to.  I’d woken up exhausted. The boys noticed it. When Luke asked me how I’d slept I said, “Not very well.” “Why?” he asked. “I have a lot on my mind,” I said. “Are you worried about something?” “Oh yeah.” “What?” he asked. “You.” A wide-eyed silence fell between us while he decided if he wanted to ask another […]

After breakfast when Buddy started circling my feet I knew he was hoping a walk was in the plan.  It’s hard to say no to his bearded face but I wanted to.  I’d woken up exhausted. The boys noticed it. When Luke asked me how I’d slept I said, “Not very well.” “Why?” he asked. “I have a lot on my mind,” I said. “Are you worried about something?” “Oh yeah.” “What?” he asked. “You.” A wide-eyed silence fell between us while he decided if he wanted to ask another [...]Keep reading...

A Year to Remember

“This is a year to forget!” he wrote in his message.  When I first read it I laughed.  Rick with his perfect mix of humor and compassion had nailed it.  The saying “when it rains it pours” has come to mind often in the last year.  Between my health and my kid’s it’s been a physically and emotionally challenging year to say the least. When his message arrived, it was four weeks post-op and life without my gallbladder wasn’t going so well. Gone were the problems I’d struggled with before, […]

“This is a year to forget!” he wrote in his message.  When I first read it I laughed.  Rick with his perfect mix of humor and compassion had nailed it.  The saying “when it rains it pours” has come to mind often in the last year.  Between my health and my kid’s it’s been a physically and emotionally challenging year to say the least. When his message arrived, it was four weeks post-op and life without my gallbladder wasn’t going so well. Gone were the problems I’d struggled with before, [...]Keep reading...

Birdseed

The sun had set hours before but I was insistent that everything on my list would be checked off.  Two more things stood in the way of getting into the shower—the birds and the flower pots. Both chores I could have delegated, but when I get in white tornado mode I don’t tend to ask for help The flower pots had to be watered but the birds really could have gone without.  It’s summertime and there are plenty of other food sources for them.  Knowing this I played a mental […]

The sun had set hours before but I was insistent that everything on my list would be checked off.  Two more things stood in the way of getting into the shower—the birds and the flower pots. Both chores I could have delegated, but when I get in white tornado mode I don’t tend to ask for help The flower pots had to be watered but the birds really could have gone without.  It’s summertime and there are plenty of other food sources for them.  Knowing this I played a mental [...]Keep reading...

Leave A Light On

I could feel the tears—the one’s I swore I wouldn’t shed—start forming in my throat.  I didn’t want to get choked-up.  Today was a happy day from Luke’s perspective.  He was leaving for a dream come true summer job in California.  Having your Mom cry when you’re 20 is embarrassing. The irony was that if he’d been leaving the night before I would’ve said, “Don’t let the door hit you on the way out,” because the kid is driving me crazy.  I couldn’t seem to hold on to that emotion […]

I could feel the tears—the one’s I swore I wouldn’t shed—start forming in my throat.  I didn’t want to get choked-up.  Today was a happy day from Luke’s perspective.  He was leaving for a dream come true summer job in California.  Having your Mom cry when you’re 20 is embarrassing. The irony was that if he’d been leaving the night before I would’ve said, “Don’t let the door hit you on the way out,” because the kid is driving me crazy.  I couldn’t seem to hold on to that emotion [...]Keep reading...

Not A Dream

I spent the morning reading.  Burying my nose in my books seemed like the best way to keep myself quietly busy.  It was my second doctor ordered fast of the week. “Nothing to eat or drink after midnight,” the nurse kept repeating while she underlined it on the instructions first with a pen and then neon as if emphasizing it once wasn’t enough. I hate yellow highlighters I thought. I opted for my Bible first before grabbing one of the many other books on my side table.  I decided to […]

I spent the morning reading.  Burying my nose in my books seemed like the best way to keep myself quietly busy.  It was my second doctor ordered fast of the week. “Nothing to eat or drink after midnight,” the nurse kept repeating while she underlined it on the instructions first with a pen and then neon as if emphasizing it once wasn’t enough. I hate yellow highlighters I thought. I opted for my Bible first before grabbing one of the many other books on my side table.  I decided to [...]Keep reading...

You Got This

I have a theory as a parent that when one child is thriving the other is just surviving.  I can’t prove this scientifically but anecdotally I know it to be true. Without realizing it I prepared for this before I brought baby number two home from the hospital.  Remember I kept telling myself—when one is smiling one will be crying.  Growth is always uneven. I knew it then and I know it now, but after all these years it’s still hard to deal with. When I ran into a friend […]

I have a theory as a parent that when one child is thriving the other is just surviving.  I can’t prove this scientifically but anecdotally I know it to be true. Without realizing it I prepared for this before I brought baby number two home from the hospital.  Remember I kept telling myself—when one is smiling one will be crying.  Growth is always uneven. I knew it then and I know it now, but after all these years it’s still hard to deal with. When I ran into a friend [...]Keep reading...

Individual Exponential Progress

Stepping out of the car a wave of memories greeted me with the cold air.  I reached for my bag and tightened the scarf around my neck. I-E-P—three letters that have dominated my life now for over fifteen years. I knew what they stood for long before I had children.  “Individual Education Plan”, the contract parents make with the school on behalf of their children who qualify for special education services.  Growing up I remember watching my Mom the Special Ed teacher draft plans for all of her students.  I […]

Stepping out of the car a wave of memories greeted me with the cold air.  I reached for my bag and tightened the scarf around my neck. I-E-P—three letters that have dominated my life now for over fifteen years. I knew what they stood for long before I had children.  “Individual Education Plan”, the contract parents make with the school on behalf of their children who qualify for special education services.  Growing up I remember watching my Mom the Special Ed teacher draft plans for all of her students.  I [...]Keep reading...

Shoo

I was headed downstairs to put the dime I’d found in my penny bowl when I noticed that the woodpecker whose been visiting my grape arbor was back.  He likes the fruit that’s accumulated through the fall.  It’s not fit for human consumption so I haven’t minded. Several of my friends have told me I should.  Woodpeckers are nuisance birds they say.  Don’t let him hang around.  The bird store said the same thing and warned me he’d destroy our stucco.  I laughed thinking he’d prefer logs to masonry.  Then […]

I was headed downstairs to put the dime I’d found in my penny bowl when I noticed that the woodpecker whose been visiting my grape arbor was back.  He likes the fruit that’s accumulated through the fall.  It’s not fit for human consumption so I haven’t minded. Several of my friends have told me I should.  Woodpeckers are nuisance birds they say.  Don’t let him hang around.  The bird store said the same thing and warned me he’d destroy our stucco.  I laughed thinking he’d prefer logs to masonry.  Then [...]Keep reading...